Measure for Measure, April 2017

In 1832, everybody in Holland wanted tulips. That is a fact. Tulips don’t taste very good. That is another fact. Well, not everybody wanted. Words are hard. A rich few rebought and resold chrysanthemums and narcissi for thousands of florins. Some poor speculated and usually lost. But not always. And words are not exactly hard; they’re, in fact, rather malleable. They can mean what you want them to, even if other people don’t totally get it. Or you. Like confusing a tulip for an onion. The limits of my language means the limits of my world. I am writing my world for you on a scratched wooden stool, while across my eyes, a little girl, with rolled 501s, writes pretty notes to her mother, smiling tiny tic tac teeth that may or may not have ever touched tulips. Did they taste good? Would she even tell me? I don’t know her, so frankly it’d be kinda weird to engage in conversation. Not weird but uncouth. Not uncouth but not okay. Maybe. I can well understand why children love sand. Fact: A sailor once mistook a tulip bulb for an onion and was jailed for wrongful consumption. Troll toll. Pretty. Yes, because I have taste, and this is my world, and mother chin on daughter shoulder, little left hand making crooked circles, lips locked; could you really convince me that they are not so ensnared in each others’ universe? So daughter spits out water onto page. So the words are now gray and unreadable. So fucking what. Even if the whole thing goes to smash, the manic bubble bursting, if you will, we still have Paris and wobbly p’s and tulips that meant something to somebodies a long long time ago. Maybe even now. Can tulips grow in the sand?? Do you know what I mean?

AUTHOR’S NOTE: tear it all to shreds, if u must. I’m nothing babe, just getting sea legs.

— Alex Saltiel

Steely Dan Lyric or Jaden Smith Tweet: A Quiz

1. You wouldn’t know a diamond if you held it in your hand.
2. The things you think are useless, I can’t understand.
3. I hope it doesn’t take for me to die for you to see what I do for you.
4. Unawareness is the only sin, and if you were aware you would know.
5. And one more chimp who isn’t here I can see the ladies talking.
6. There is no nutrients in our food anymore or in our soil or in our water.
7. The head of the Sphinx will fall off in the near future.
8. A world become one of salads and sun only a fool would say that.
9. You taught me how to play the piano but have never heard me.
10. If he’s holding it high, He’s telling a lie.
11. Anybody on the street has murder in his eyes, you feel no pain, and you’re younger.
12. How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren’t real?
13. The Great Gatsby Is One Of The Greatest Movies Of All Time, Coachella.
How did you do????
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3. JS
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